Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Where's the Boobs? My take on the 2008 Olympics

Seriously, not one of these women could fill out a AA bra. None of the swimmers, skaters or volley ball players. Have female athletes been secretly undergoing breast reduction surgery? I don't get it. Figure skaters have breasts, why not gymnasts? I thought there were age limits this year so they couldn't complete those pre-pubescent children any more. It's just creepy seeing so many women in skintight lycra looking like some breast cancer survivor's fitness group. I know I'll never be an Olympic athlete, but I always thought it was because I'm totally unathletic and uncoordinated and basically lazy when it comes to physical fitness. But know that it's not my couch potato soul that is holding me back, it's 36D's that God (and my Jewish mother) gave me. Who knew? Without them, I'm sure I'd be doing triple rotations with another androgynous girl on a 3 story diving platform in perfect synchronization, or surreptitiously picking lycra out of my butt after whacking a volleyball over a net.

And what's with the slutty uniforms? The men who play beach volleyball don't dress like they're about to work a shift at Scores or the Golden Banana or wherever the gals go for a bachelorette party these days. Why do the women have to wear g-strings to bat the ball over the net while the men get to dress like NBA players in loose comfy shorts.

It just doesn't seem fair.

3 Comments:

Blogger CountessLaurie said...

HA! That is sooo funny and sooo true!

P.S. If you go to a friend's only blog, I will miss you!

12:30 PM  
Blogger Zack said...

Boobs throw them off balance.

Gymnasts intentionally delay puberty. They are trained at a young age to work with the body they have, and sudden changes in weight distribution require them to completely retrain.

Even aside from that, big boobs are a major disadvantage in in gymnastics, as is height. Gymnasts (men AND women) need short, compact bodies.

I know this because there are a lot of gymnasts in wushu...and its an issue in wushu too. My current coach is six foot three, he's one of the only players of that height to get to his level ever.

10:40 PM  
Blogger Margaret said...

But it's not just the gymnasts, it's the volley ball players and the swimmers and the divers.. You name the summer sport, and the women are scantily clad and breast-less.

I suppose the women's archers cut off their left boobs like the Amazons did.

9:10 AM  

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