Friday, June 11, 2004

They don't update the "Blogs of Note" very often do they? I was kind of grooving on that Andy Kaufman one. It was nice to pretend he was still alive. but I guess the joke got old. He hasn't written for nearly a month.

yesterday it was my birthday. It was an astonishingly low key event at my office. Recently our office manager decided we weren't going to have birthday parties any more. Which is fine, but now nobody even says happy birthday. I'm getting a little sick of it.

Rich is miserable at work. He comes home pale and stressed looking like his soul is slowly being sucked from his ear. I really want him to quit, but it just seems better for us if he waits until September, unless of course he finds another job in the interim. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. In September, I'll go back to work full time. To say the least, I have mixed feelings about this. I do like my job, I like it a lot. But I don't make enough money to pay for fulltime childcare and groceries for me and my family. Rich has to give me an allowance. I can't believe how expensive groceries are. I thought me cooking all the time would be cheaper than going out to eat and getting takeout-- and it is, but not cheaper enough. My point is, that I won't be netting much more than I am now after paying for 5 days a week in childcare. AND I won't have a full day to spend with The Boy and run errands.

I was feeling outrageously guilty this morning about not wanting to be a Stay-at-home-mom. I feel like it means that I don't love my baby enough. But I love my baby more than I ever imagined possible. He is my favorite person in the whole world. When he's resting in my arms I feel like I'm holding the worlds most precious gift. That ring from Lord of the Rings has 1% of the allure of my son (who has all the draw and none of the evil) But I don't want to not work. I see so many women who didn't like their jobs much and thought, "I know.. I'll have a baby and I won't work for a while!" And they're even more miserable than they were before. but now they're racked with guilt about being miserable. I think, the best thing we can do for our kids is be happy. I know some SAHMS that are SO happy with that choice. There's nowhere else they'd rather be, and I know some that seem to want to eat their own heads. The most ideal choice for me, would be to continue working part time. But methinks that's not an option. My second choice is to get paid really well so that I'm not just breaking even on the childcare and the groceries. My third choice is to stay where I am, because at least at Emerson, I can have a very regular schedule.

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

Looks like I'm ranting today...

There are a few things I'd like never to see in the news again.

One: The interworkings of the Catholic Church, I mean NOTE to the press. For the millions of NON and NON-Practicing Catholics in Massachusetts, we don't really care what Parishes are closing, nor who has been slated to run what. I have worked at many different companies in Boston and maybe one percent of the people I've worked with are practicing Catholics. They closed a public school in Somerville this year and there was no Globe coverage of that. I'm sure it effected as many people as Our Lady or Perpetual Grilled-Cheese-Sandwiches or whatever it's called, over in (Insert Random Boston borough here). Yes, I do think it's news that they've been covering up decades worth of child abuse. But they report it like these guys are elected officials. Report it in the Catholic press, but don't waste precious airtime on it. The more time wasted on who is going to be the archbishop of whatever, the less time is devoted to exposing the hideousness of the Bush administration.

Two: I'd like never to see: "President" Bush with out the word "Former" before it.

Three: I would really like never to see Jennifer Lopez. I despise her. I've tried to watch a couple of her movies and she's such a zero talent. And they've all flopped!! Why do they keep casting her? Her music is completely devoid of soul and originality. I just don't get it. Why is she such a celebrity? I totally see the appeal of say, Beyonce, even if I don't particularly enjoy her music. When did the Boston Globe become a gossip tabloid? When did it become a mouthpiece for the Catholic Church?

Enough ranting. My birthday is coming up on Thursday. I'll be the big Three FOUR! I think I'm practicing getting crochety. I cut all my hair off, or at least a good ten inches of it. and it's light brown instead of blonde who knew? But now, the magnificent little dude can not grab it as easily.

Speaking of the dude, he had a little fever on Sunday. But it seemed to have resolved itself by the end of the day. I've been letting him crawl around the sandy area in our local playground. He loves it. He gets filthy, but he's a little boy. That's what they do.

We signed him up for 2 or 3 days a week at our local Mullbery daycare in Davis Square. It's not ideal. I'd like somewhere a little more touchy-feely. But I think he'll do just fine there. Once he's two, hopefully we'll send him to Bigelow where my neice went. She did really well there. The best thing about Mullbery is that they let the kids fingerpaint with pudding. How cool is that?